Friday, September 23, 2016

Self worth and the zodiac: the conditions we place on loving ourselves

We all know people with obvious low self-esteem and issues of self worth but I'm guessing we all have our own criteria for judging our worth. If we work around the zodiac we find that each sun sign's ego is a little bit different in how they judge self importance.

Aries values winning, whether their battles be romantic, business, sporting or military. They have an ability to fire-up and motivate others, to get things started. The problem for their self esteem comes when they lose.

Taurus values their own strength, their ability to protect others, to put food on the table and acquire property. The self esteem suffers through the loss of the very things the value. Old age, frailty, children leaving home, poverty can all dent their self-worth

Gemini values intelligence, vocabulary, fluency, their ability to communicate ideas, to have their stories heard and enjoyed, their ability to charm and entertain others. Their problem comes when they lose their audience, when people walk away because they've got things they'd rather do than listen.

Cancer values their capacity to nurture and care for others, whether as a good cook, a mother or carer. Their problems come when they either lack a caring role or others push them away for being too mothering.

Leo values their pride, their ability to organize, lead others. Their worth is tied up in how much others recognize their importance. wounded pride is their greatest threat. Their pride can built on shaky ground making their fall from grace even worse. Mistakes found out leave them defensive or fudging to cover up.

Virgo values health, neatness, order and perfection. Possibly the hardest set of conditions for maintaining self worth.

Libra values beauty, their own and that of their environment, harmonious relations with their lover and extended family. Old age, the natural wear and tear of material possessions, arguments - all leave them rattled, denting their self confidence. Beauty is transient.

Scorpio values power, their ability to know secrets and getting others to bend to their will. At a higher level their worth is in arising above that by transforming themselves. Their greatest fear is a competitor acquiring more power than them. Unfortunately, unless you emperor of the universe someone is always going to have more power.

Sagittarius values exploration, the chance to grow and explore, honesty and directness. Learning and teaching also come into this. Conversely if they fail to achieve academically, morally or lack for experiences they are inclined to see themselves as dumb, ignorant or uncultured.

Capricorn values achievement, through work, their ability to solve and rise above problems, to achieve and acquire, for their own benefit and for the benefit of those they are loyal too. They value loyalty to and from their family. They like their criticisms and suggestions to be appreciated as the help they intend them to be. Being beaten by problems is their greatest danger. Being unappreciated for their advice leaves them cold

Aquarius values being unique, being loved and understood because of and despite their innate nerdiness. They value the ability to innovate, to break down and challenge the old on the way to making something new. Their greatest fear is being ordinary. An environment that does not allow them to innovate and individualize can leave them withdrawn.

Pisces values compassion, reflection, dreams and visions. Most of all they dream of a  world without suffering. Realism and skepticism can leave them doubting their innate intuition. The limits on their capacity to solve suffering of others could leave them frustrated and questioning their relevance in the world. Death is the ever present threat, the ultimate suffering that threatens to beat them.

All these ego mindsets are traps. They all have built in conditions that leave the individual vulnerable to a dent to their self esteem

We are all vulnerable to all of these traps but usually the one that matches are sun sign will predominate. 

The only fool proof way to value yourself is unconditionally. Not requiring certain external conditions to be met in order to love and be compassionate towards yourself.
Everyone has their own favorite answers. For me, I find that Anam Thubten in "no self, no problem" effectively outlines the benefits of transcending our frail egos. Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche, in his many books videos and online courses shows how to find that inner stillness, silence and spaciousness that can effectively get us in touch with an unconditional source of love, joy, compassion and non judgement we can realize as our true "self". The Toltec tradition of Don Miguel Ruiz (aka The Four Agreements" and "The Mastery of Love") and Heather Ash Amara ("Warrior Goddess Training') provides a philosophy that empowers the individual. And astrology helps us see with greater clarity and self awareness the karmic ego traps we are working to transcend. 

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